It's 1.45am and i should be up at 6, oh lordy.
My head is just spinning with millions o wee things and i know i wont sleep if i dont get them out somehow.
Was in Scotland for a month, it was good, loved seeing my friends and family, having christmas and just chilling out.
Im missing kelly, caz and heather a lot, i love them. Im so excited about caz having a baby! I need to put my photos up on Bebo, some good memories there! Thank you to everyone who made an effort to come out and catch up! My favorite day was when me and kelly went up glasgow for the donphobia gig that never happened! Ended up being soooo good, oooh the pasta, and peel's place!
My last day in Scotland was quite upsetting, it was my sister's birthday and things weren't what i'd expected. It was a shit note to end on when it could have been so much better and im being plagued by dreams that i didnt do enought to make my relationship with my sister better. Anyways, it puts a pure lump in my throat just thinking about it so anyways.... I went out with Ben later that night and he cheered me up by just being himself.
I was so happy to get back and see mahdi, he's awesome and wonderful and a better man than i ever thought existed. I dont think i can leave him for such a long length of time again.
The reason im feeling a bit stressed is because of a few things.
First mahdi's mum and dad have kinda separated, mahdi's mum is pretty upset so we're trying to see her as much as possible because she's all alone in her house now because mahdi's siblings have gone to study abroad. And mahdi's dad had a heart attack this week and is intensive care and is having a bypass operation on Monday. All this is stressing mahdi out, even though he doesn't say, he's being used as the go-between by his parents, his mum is being so needy and his dad is gona have this major operation. So all that stuff is like this real stuff and i dont know what im meant to do in the middle of it all except just try to be supportive to everyone.
The second thing is that i've been given a promotion at work, which is amazing and im really happy about it but there dont seem to be enough hours in the day to get all the work done, especially when im trying to deal with mahdi's family and then come home and chill mahdi out and make sure he isn't getting too stressed. Im already teaching 40-50 classes per week - working between 8am and 8.45pm and now iv taken on the role of English Co-ordinator which is around another 10 hours - i dont know how im really gona fit it in without being way more exhausted than i already am - iv only been back at work 2 weeks!
After watching kelly's You Tube videos (which i love and totally cheer me up) i just wana find more time to do fun stuff! I wana be creative and find more things to enjoy in life, i cant be all work and family issues!
Anyways, im sitting waiting for mahdi to come back from his mum's. She called at midnight and asked him to come over, she didnt give a reason. I texted him to see what was goin on but he just said everything was ok.
It's 2am, i wana cuddle into him and sleep.
- Mood:
anxious
I just wana update myself on everything I've been up to since I last posted, it's been busy!
Dec 18. Cafe Royale with Kelly, Heather and Sam – sooo yummy! Donphobia at Slanj – good crowd out, sooo merry and drunk!
Dec 19. Hungover. Horrible floods, stayed home.
Dec 20. Old Bank Bar with Kelly, then over to the Jimmy and Red. Hev and Jud out – santa beards and drunkness!
Dec 21. In the Jimmy at 11.30am, hungover, breakfast with my old friend Gillian, caught up.
Dec 22. Glasgow with Sara for Tapas – yum yum!
Dec 23. Visited some family. Took my Dad for lunch. Spent the whole day with Heather. Did her Christmas shopping, had a lovely dinner at her house, went Cafe Continental, her mate won £180!
Dec 24. Town for some clothes shopping, saw everyone! Jimmy Watt with Kelly and Steph then Slanj for the Coy Dogs. Saw Lauren and Lorna and loadsa others, home for presents!
Dec 25. Christmas Day, stayed home, ate my Mum’s yummy food, got a Nintendo DS, all the Horrible Histories, loads of Nightmare Before Christmas stuff and pyjamas.
Dec 26. Went in town for a bit, bought some CDs, chilled out at home.
Dec 27. Cafe Balfe with Caz, Becky and their Mum. Went to Sara’s then to the Elbow Room, had lots of wine and Quavers, saw Craig Watt, got v drunk v quick!
Dec 28. Went to Glasgow to meet my friends I was in uni with, so funny! Was reminded that I burst someone’s lip and that he respected me more after i did it! Totally forgot about that.
Dec 29. Mad day with Kelly – nothing went to plan but turned out awesome! Missed the bus to go bowling in Braehead so just went to Glasgow by train and bus (which hit another bus and got stuck in traffic). Wanted to goto the Beer Republic but both had no tables so we went to an Italian restaurant (Paperinio’s I think), their pasta was sex! Went to the Barfly to see Donphobia then found out that they had pulled out after we had paid in, damn it damn it grrr! Got a bus to Paisley (no trains on) then ran into an off sales and got a carry-out just before they closed, yas! Got the train to Greenock and went to Peel’s and had such a funny night – im glad the day turned out the way it did!
Dec 30. Went to Edinburgh, sales were mental, bought loadsa CDs and DVDs, went to my cousin’s and had a pure delicious meal and laughed at his hilarious kids! Came back down the road, Stephanie had drank a few bottles of wicked and was being so funny, stayed up with her for a bit exchanging gossip ahah!
Dec 31. Met my friend Kirsty in Cafe Balfe to catch up, she’s the busiest person I know! Went home and just did stuff around the house, clearing out my old stuff. Some of my family came over for the bells and had a few drinks.
Jan 1. So far had a big long lie in, and just waiting for my mum's new year dinner - all home made: tomato soup then steak pie and loadsa veg, pavlova and white chocolate mousse. I love home cooked meals mmmmmmmmmm.
I have one week left till i go back to Mahdi, poor thing is bored, i cant wait to see him, pure missing him! But just wana fill the next week with fun, see you then!
- Mood:bouncy
But hurrah!!!!! I am home now and it's been lovely, *smile*
To be honest I haven't been running around like a mad drunk woman, as i did the last time i was here, I really need to just relax a wee bit coz I have been working 45+ hour weeks since July with very very few days off. People treat showers and beds as their home comforts, but to be honest, it's the feeling of just being able to chill out on the couch and feel the love and warmth (and home cooking!) of your family around you that are the real home comforts. I'm also loving all the christmas decorations, another *smile*
Here's what I've been up to since i got back (more a note for me really, but this is a journal after all):
Mon 8: exhausted from flight, slept all day then chilled out with my sister, getting back into British TV!
Tues 9: went in town to do some xmas shopping.
Old Bank Bar to meet up with Caz, Kelly and Heather (Steph drove me and stayed :)
Wed 10: more xmas shopping, almost finished!
Thurs 11: went to largs with my friend Sara - went to Nardini's coz we used to work there, wanted to see the new look.
went to see Ben, i feel bad that mahdi isnt here too!
Fri 12: went to Glasgow to see my friend Jen, it was soooo wet and cold!
Sat 13: went to Edinburgh to the German Christmas village and then my cousins place to exchange xmas gifts!
Sun 14: had lunch with Caz and Becky in the Jimmy then had a wander in the town.
went to see Electric 6 with Heather! Loadsa dancing, so funny! nice wee walk in George Sq - nice lights.
Mon 15: sleeep! Cafe Balfe (or Bamf as i call it) with Kelly and Heather.
Braehead with Stephanie and Kelly!
Tues 16: Loaded with the cold, stayed home all day, wrapped presents, read, steph made my tea yum!
Steph wanted to go to Tesco and get stuff after tea so went with her, met Martin McKenzie, his hair is all gone!
Spent the evening watching TV with Steph and texting Mahdi.
I pure miss mahdi this time! It's the first time I've been back and really wished I could nip back and see him for a few days and come back, but that would be crazy. The past two times i came back here I was so so happy to get away from Bahrain and everything to do with it. But since last August (when I was last here) loads of things have changed and I am so much happier with Bahrain and my job and the fact that I am happier and more chilled out means that me and mahdi are even better. I really feel like this year has been one of our best years ever! Everyone who knows us, knows that we have always been a very close couple, we love eachother like mad, without making everyone sick (in my opinion anyways) but I can honestly say I feel like I love him more than I ever have, and I can't wait to see him again, but absence really does make the heart grow fonder, It's all good :)
ANYWAYS.......
I have been home since last monday and i've seen most of the people that i've really missed but I'm hoping to see everyone else at Donphobia on Thursday! Should be good, hope there'll be a good crowd!
- Location:HOME!!! Scotland!
- Mood:
chipper
I'm so restless and im supposed to wake up at 5am but its already past midnight and im not tired at all!
Everything is done so i should be able to relax!
My clothes are ironed and laid out for tomorrow, my bag is ready for work, my breakfast and lunch are ready, the whole house has been dusted and hoovered, all clothes have been ironed, all animals have been fed and watered, bathroom has been cleaned, all dishes have been done, i've done all the self-grooming you can possibly do, also did a pregnancy test coz i thought the doubts ive been having lately may be contributing to my insanity - all clear, no babies, phewwwwww!
I dont know what to do, coz i have a very long day tomorrow and i have to be on the ball coz i teach adults and they'll totally dis you if you're tired and talking shit, boohooo dono wot to do. Also the auditors are in from Germany to kick our asses if we arent doing our jobs right, fantastic.
I havent stopped lately! Work has been really busy, but i finish up in about 2 weeks, yay!
The owner of our house has started building on top of our house which is extremely noisy and dusty and annoying and upsetting. He wants to build 2 more floors on top of our house to make 4 more apartements. He also wants to knock in the wall of our living room which faces the main road so he can make parking spaces, very sucky coz the living room is my favourite room. Also the weather is amazing right now, in the mid twenties so it'd be nice to sit in the gardern but rocks are flying around, peckhahahjdfhjsdfjkls. i don't know how to express my discontent right now.
So work is busy, our house is being half destroyed, mahdi has stuff goin on with his family that im staying out of, he's bored with his job too and getting more frustrated by the day so he's looking for something else.
But there are lots of nice things going on tooooo! Mahdi has been sooo sweet lately, buying me new clothes and making me dinner and giving me lots of love and attention. Today is our anniversary. We've been married for 3 years, and together for 6 in total. I love him to bits and i wouldn't have things any other way. If we're good, everything is good and all the bullshit i mentioned above are just mere niggles.
The other great thing is that im coming home in 3 weeks, the past few months have flown in soooo fast. I've got my tickets, passport and pounds (already exchanged!) sitting waiting to be used. Im more excited than you can imagine about spending christmas and new year with my family and seeing all my friends and just letting loose coz i've been working like a mad woman since June and i need a break!
well i better go and at least try to sleep
night night xxxx
- Mood:
restless
Feel so chilled today!
I woke up on Thursday morning with a horrible cold and sore throat, went to work then came home, changed, went to the Pharmacy for cold medicine and the DVD rental store, came home and went to bed and watched movies.
Stayed in Yesterday, not feeling better but ironed and cleaned the house, now its all sparkly, organised my work folders and watched more movies, took more medicine.
Today Saturday, house is lovely and clean, nothing to do, take more medicine go on internet, la dee dah.
I know it sounds pure boring but im happy that its the weekend and i can try to get rid of this cold before Alex arrives on Tuesday. I cant wait to have some fun and have a few days off work - i had to fight them to get 3 days off coz we're so busy but i got them and i intend to use every minute running around Bahrain showing Alex everywhere and having some girly time before she goes off to Bangcock (that doesn't look right, does it?) and New Zealand. She arrives at 5am so i'll be driving when the sun is coming up, how nice : )
I was pure good mates with alex when we were in first year college in 2001/2002 when we discovered that we lived a 5 minute walk from eachother, we used to go out a lot, but then life happens, uni, work, different boyfriends, different towns cities countries, so im really looking forward to just having as much fun as possible for the 5 days she's here. I hope the weather cools down a bit its still tooooo hot.
Then when she leaves I'll just be working full on and saving up until i knock off in December and come home, it cant come soon enough, im getting impatient now! It's only 7 weeks. I'm gona have to be extra nice to mahdi to make up for running away for 4 1/2 weeks like a big selfish cow. But it has to be done. Another christmas without my family would be ridiculous. Another year without Kelly, Caz and Heather would be Hell. I havent been home since last August but things have changed a lot with me and my life here and im really happy.
I also have a feeling that something is going on with some of my friends that no one is telling me about coz they're worried i'll get upset but i'd rather that they just told me instead of protecting me/not dealing with it themselves. Maybe im wrong but i can feel it.
Anyways, I'm gona go , my mum is due to phone me, xxx
- Mood:
sick
Thursday: visited some of mahdi's family, was nice.
Friday: went to my friend's apartment building and had a girly day: swimming and catching up, steam room, then went back to her flat and she made dinner and we did our nails and continued to talk shit about everything - so chilled out.
Was texting Kelly and we've decided to go to London for a few days while im home, im so excited!!! I've never been to London before and everyone here in Bahrain has, it just isnt right! Plus, i bet london is beautiful at xmas!
Saturday (today): slept late, aerobics, cleaned house, my mum called, got ready then mahdi came back home.
It's still Ramadan so Iftaar (eating time) was around 5.45 so we decided to go out to a wee cafe we like. I had monster baked potato with chicken, mushroom, corn and grated cheese yumeeee! Was pure full so came home and fell into bed with mahdi and fell asleep for 2 hours and i've just woken up. Had a pure ramdom dream about teaching people to read french and it wasnt happening and there were loadsa ppl around that i was in high school with, strange stuff....
Anyways, so i guess its gona be really difficult for me to sleep tonight! I don't really feel like goin out again, just gona stay in my pyjamas and finish my book about Saudi girls trying to get it on in such a restrictive society "Girls of Riyadh" check it out and find out about all their weird dating (or lack of) customs.
oooooooooooooooo im going to london! Yas! with kelly! Yas! Im gona be home in 2 months! Yas! ooooooooooooooooooooooooo
- Location:smelly cat room
- Mood: cheerful
- Music:foo fighters
Ooohhhhh im not consistant at all, am I? I didnt sit on my ass and update in yonks and now i've done it twice in one night, you know what they say, once you pop you just can't stop!
Today has been quite a nice day, I finished work at 10.15am then I went to the post office to post some late birthday presents (x Kelly x).
After that I went to a business college to try to enroll for a course that starts next week in Marketing but the course is full so I put my name on the waiting list and they’ll call if anyone pulls out. I hope they do coz I really wana get some new certificates and learn some new skills.
I love my job but I’m feeling a bit bored so I wana start making myself more employable in other fields than what I’ve already tried. When I come back from Scotland in January I wana start looking for another job, probably with an international company, coz I want my work experience to be with a recognized and reputable company so that, if we move to another country in the next few years, then it won’t be too difficult to get a job. We’ll see what happens.
If I don't get onto this one then I'll do a course in Public Relations next month.
So after going to the college I went to my friend Julie’s house, she’s from Glasgow and she used to work with me at my current job but she left, she’s soo nice. We gabbed for like 5 hours about everything, she was talking about her ghostly experiences, spine chilling stuff, not the usual kind of conversation, but the good kind that awakens thoughts you’d forgotten about. Then I came home and mahdi, my darling, had made dinner, got that down me then got ready to go out.
So after going to the college I went to my friend Julie’s house, she’s from Glasgow and she used to work with me at my current job but she left, she’s soo nice. We gabbed for like 5 hours about everything, she was talking about her ghostly experiences, spine chilling stuff, not the usual kind of conversation, but the good kind that awakens thoughts you’d forgotten about. Then I came home and mahdi, my darling, had made dinner, got that down me then got ready to go out.
Tonight my company was offering free taster courses in all different languages so Mahdi and I went to an Italian class! It was really fun coz the teacher made us talk to each other in Italian, no English!!! It was funny; I think I’d like to go back for more, especially with mahdi, coz its something different for us to do, and I always enjoy learning new things, wakes me up.
Then we wanted to go to the cinema but there was fck all on so we came home and now Im watching Dexter and updating whoever is reading this, its more for me really, so I can keep track of the days slipping behind me.
So i think thats pretty much everything, my mind is a bit foggy coz i've been up since 6.30. Next week I only have 28 classes and no early mornings, yas!!! So its Thursday night and I’ve got Friday and Saturday off, no definite plans, just gona relax and see what happens ……gona go love my mad one xxx
- Mood: happy
It has been a ridiculously long time since I last posted anything or emailed anyone and for that I apologize!
The past few months of summer have whizzed away. My parents were here for the first two weeks of July, which was really nice, it was pretty chilled out, just visiting places here and there and eating a lot (what else is there to do?!?)
The bad thing about this summer was that I had to work so hard! I had around 40 - 54 classes per week since the second week of July and now its Ramadan and its still sooooo hot and humid, I've had like no free time, grr! But the huge amount of classes does mean that I’m managing to save some lovely spending money for my trip home in December! I've booked my flights from December 8 to January 8, wooohooooo, im sooooo excited! I've missed three Christmases so I have to come home this year.
When I have managed to find a window of magical time, I've had a lot of fun. I've been to Dar Island a few times. It's nice, small and clean; it has a bar, a cafe, wooden huts for changing or whatever. Mahdi likes to go snorkeling; I just like to swim back and forth to the shore. You get there by speedboat, which is fun. Its good just to get off Bahrain for a day and swim way out in the sea.
They've opened a water theme park called the Lost Paradise of Dilmun, when you get there you change into your swimsuit and run around like a kid from ride to ride and swim through the rivers and caves, they have a ladies night so that all of Bahrain can down abayas (the black cloaks that Muslim women wear) but its causing controversy due to lots of teenage girls lying that they are there and are actually off with their boyfriends, so far the mullahs (super religious dudes) haven’t managed to shut things down. After going to the ladies night I have renamed the park the "Lost Land of Lesbos" because there was a frightening amount of manly butch women that I would have asked for their IDs before believing that they were really girls. Scary stuff! But anyways, it was fun and a great way to cool down in the soaring heat; it’s been 52 degrees this week!
It was my birthday during August and I decided that since I hadn't had a holiday this year, that I would have an 'almost holiday'.
So I checked into the Gulf Hotel 5* and texted mahdi and told him to come meet me in room whatever, it was a total surprise to him, kinky hahah! So he came over and twas fun, then we went for dinner in the hotel’s Chinese restaurant and then to Sherlock Holmes (an English pub) where some of my friends were. The next morning we went swimming in the pool and it was icy cold, which was refreshing coz it was so damn hot. I loved it but I got totally burnt even though I only swam for 30 minutes, ahh!
On my birthday I went to a fancy hair salon and got my hair all chopped up and dyed, I got a funky fringe put in, I know I know, there aren’t any photos, but LJ doesn’t seem to let me do it like I used to, I don’t know why. You’ll be sick of my face appearing everywhere you are when I’m home so its not that urgent, but I do look hotter ahaha!
Anyways, I can't think of a whole lot else that I've been doin, all I know is that its Ramadan, and all cafes and restaurants are closed during the day and that means i cant go out with any of my Bahraini friends, coz during the day they work then go home sleep, eat, then spend time with their families - every day is like christmas dinner with your clan. So its just work and home and chill, maybe i need it...
Anyways, I can't think of a whole lot else that I've been doin, all I know is that its Ramadan, and all cafes and restaurants are closed during the day and that means i cant go out with any of my Bahraini friends, coz during the day they work then go home sleep, eat, then spend time with their families - every day is like christmas dinner with your clan. So its just work and home and chill, maybe i need it...
- Location:my red couch
- Mood:
sleepy - Music:no music, just Dexter
Just incase ur confused, the weekend in bahrain is friday/saturday, so tonight (thursday) is basically a friday night.
I had a really long shitty day, involving traffic jams, bad directions, sunburn, sweat, and a sweary outburst at someone from work. Can't be bothered telling the story coz its boring, but man am i happy to be home!
When i got home mahdi wasnt here but i discoverd that he'd got his hands on Lost seasons 1-3 and Desperate Houswives seasons 1 & 2, sweet!!!
He came home a little while later with food so i was already on the way to having a much better day, then we had a 20 minute slapping/punching match which then turned into kicking and wrestling, fun fun fun...
Not sure wot we're doing tonight but we usually end up going out with a few of our friends for a late dinner and sometimes the cinema, im easy, not bothered wot we do tonight, just happy not to be working, although i do feel like a wee drink (our cupboard is well stocked at the mo, absinthe too, mmm)
Im excited coz my mum and dad are coming here on Saturday for 2 weeks!!! I havent seen my parents since the beginning of August or something, so it'll be cool to see them (and get all my early birthday presents, yas!). Work has been quite nice and are letting me work for 3 days intensively (and get the same money as i would in a week), so that i can have 6 days off without missing pay, yay!
This will be the first time that my parents have seen our house, coz last time they were here (july 2006) we still lived with mahdi's parents. So i have 2 more days left of cleaning like a madwoman (so my mum doesnt think im a crap wife) and working out using my Reebok Step (so that my mum doesnt think im a fat pig) haha!
Coolio, well tonight and tomorrow im just gona spend some time on my own and with mahdi before my parents come, so better get to it, ( I can't wait till my mammy's here to make my dinners and bake cakes, yum yum!)
jx
- Mood: happy
I have 2 wishes at the moment:
either:
sue white comes to live with me
or
i have to get off this island.
im bored bored bored and its hot hot hot.
I was out with my friends earlier and there was no joy to be had, i dont want to do any of the things i usually do but i dont know what the fuck else im interested in doing. Im frustrating myself! I need a new hobby or bad habit, just something to look forward to doing.
I miss the fun and side splitting laughter that i have with my friends at home: kelly, caz, heather, it just hurts not being with you.
I got cabin fever, what to do?
- Location:the cabin
- Mood: sad
Im ecstatic for 5 minutes then im down for ten, iv got so many things to be happy about but the stupid niggling little things always beat me down.
Think i need a breather, im a control freak, and im not in control.
I keep having dreams about home, thats great but it makes me so sad sometimes when i wish they were real. I had a dream that i was in a field with my sister putting on makeup, strange, so strange, i'll never stop feeling guilty about leaving her. I wana go back to the old days when i'd stay over at cazs, listen to music, watch tv, lie in the gardern... just not caring about anything.
I wana go home to my mum and have sunday dinner with yorkshire puddings and runny gravy over roast beef and roast potatoes, then sleep on the couch and watch tv, and imagine everything is perfect.
And i wana be there for kelly, i know your toughing it out by yourself, but i wish i could be of some use.
- Mood:
moody
Saturday: Mahdi left and went to Iran, i couldn't sleep.
Sunday: Knackered from no sleep. 11 of my students sat their end of term exams, all passed, yas!
Monday: Long day again, went to my friend's house for dinner, my rabbit had 4 new babies!
Tuesday: Had a fight at work coz they arent starting my pay rise till this month, was supposed to be last month, grrrrr!
Wednesday: All the baby rabbits died coz the moma didnt feed them and the other rabbits trampled them :(
Thursday: Worked till 8 then went to my work night out, was good, then went to party till the wee hours, much needed!
Friday: Had lunch at my friends house, her daughter came over to mine to see all the animals, she really liked it, took her home and came back, lay in bed and read for a few hours, got ready and went out to the pub (Kelly's Harwoods) then a late night cafe till early hours coz was totally starving. Really good night : )
Saturday: Someone called and asked if i wanted to be an extra in tv show for the day and get paid, sounded so cool but i had to go to work, maybe another time...
Sunday (today): Came home from work around 5:30, fed all the animals, made myself some nice pasta and managed to get the computer working again (hence this entry) coz its been duff all week. Going to get ready and go pick mahdi up from the airport at 12.30am, it'll be good to have him back, its been a really long week, and i need to ......ladeedah!
Anyways, must go, lots to do before i leave to go to the airport, love, jen xxx
Basically i've been working like a madwoman, this week i have 52 classes! It's alright tho, i got my second evaluation, and my second pay rise, yay! So it makes it all worth it. Im just tired tho, and a bit bored of get up at 6.30, work at 8, home, lunch, feed cats, work till 9, home and collapse.
This week is strange, coz mahdi went to Iran with his parents on Saturday and he won't be back until next Sunday. I've never been totally on my own before, not even in Scotland, coz wheneva my parents went on holiday I went and stayed with Mahdi or friends. Its so weird knowing that he isn't even in the country. I feel really alone. Im used to just picking up the phone and talking about random shit wheneva im at work and have a minute, but i cant do that if he isnt in the country, i keep forgetting. I feel like a part of me is missing, i love just the stupid repertoire we have of bouncing daft ideas of eachother and the constant carry-on. The house is really quiet without him. I couldn't sleep right last night, i kept waking up coz i couldnt feel the warmth of his arm around me, protecting me from whateverwhat. I'll see how things go tonight. I thought i'd love having a week of peace to myself, i know that i've been needing it, but its just strange, not just being in the house alone, but being in the country alone.
I've been a wee weirdo lately, and i know it. Just moody, bored, fed up, lost, no idea of what i want ever. i hope i sort myself out this week. ive been too introverted lately, i hate that feeling when ur not sad or upset, theres just an underlying feeling of i dont know what, i need to kick myself the fuck out of it and start being normal.
I dont wana talk to anyone, i dont wana do anything, i just wana go to work, come home and sleep but then i have nightmares. Well i've got a week to figure it all out.
I think part of the problem is lack of direction. i was talking to mahdi and he asked me"Isn't there anything you really want, or want to do?" and i really dont know the answer to that: i've done a lot of things (graduated, emigrated, got married, got a house, got a sweet job and car) but now i dont know what im meant to work towards. I mean im happy with my situation and everything but i feel theres something i havent done yet and i dont know what it is - i need goals to work towards but at the same time im scared of attempting new things that i might fail miserably at, i know thats a major flaw, but at least i acknowledge it. Everything i've done before now (see previous brackets) just seemed to flow into my hands, it all seemed like the natural direction to go in, but now there arent any interesting spring boards presenting themselves before me.
Does anyone else feel like this? Im sure most people do but i feel like a spare part that has no purpose.
Haha i just realised im a tool whose having a mid-life crisis at 23, very good!
- Mood:
contemplative
but all is good, its a bit cold here at the mo but we've got a pure cosy electric heater which i keep falling asleep infront off!
anyways, besides doing loadsa naughty things i cany write online, hahaheehee, iv been floating through the days enjoying the novelty o wearin chunky jumpers, coz you just cany do that the rest of the year, its too damn hot!
i've found a new favourite place to go and read called Dome, its all dark wood and dim lights like the james watt, and they serve pumpkin soup and pints of coffee yum yum!
Other than than i've just been getting used to my new car - a mazda mx5, its sexy and red! woohoo!
I've also dyed my hair dark dark brown and my hair is really long, i like it and everyone else seems to aswell, but a few people at work didnt recognise me and walked right past. I'll take sum pix later!
I have my first proper Arabic lesson tomorrow, so im looking forward to that! Also been working out to my Carmen Electra dvd, its well hard but i guess that means its good for me!
Also, hopefully hopefully un sha allah i'll book my tickets home when mahdi gets back with his credit card! im aiming for june for 3 weeks,yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My new car!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Mood:
cold - Music:White Skull
Even though im working till 9pm boohoo, i should hopefully end up doing something good!
Hope you've all got nice plans, whether its at home or out on the town, have a good one!
So, i guess its good to reflect on the year! 2007 wasn't bad, in fact it was pretty amusing!
In brief: here's the year that was 2007:
*** Went back to Scotland twice! Yas!
*** Moved outa mad's mum's house and into our own place! Yas!
***Quit my horrible job and got a lovely new one! Yas!
***Was in 3 car accidents, only 1 minor one was my fault. Im alive, Yas!
***Got pneumonia and spent a few weeks in bed. Zzzz, Im alive, Yas!
***I ran a marathon, stick that up your arse! Yas!
***Found a suncream that really fucking works, YAS!
***Went to a zillion weddings, got to wear fancy ball-gowns, YAS!
***Dyed my hair bright red, best hair on the island, YAS!
***Ordered a bright red convertible, its coming next week, YAS!
So thats all i can think of for now, its been quite a good year i think! Thanks to the powers that be. Here's hoping that 2008 will be just as good or even better! Im pure excited coz Kelly is goni be here in 2 months, double YAS!
love y'all , take care and have a great new year!
jen xxx
- Mood: cheerful
On Christmas Eve i went shopping in the morning for a few last minute gifts. Went home and had a big bowl of festive tomato soup. Met up with my friend and went walking in an area that has really nice christmas lights all over the houses and bushes and palm trees. Went back to her place and had some amazing creamy carrot and corriander soup (my favourite) and watched the Muppet Christmas Carol with her kids.
At night me and mahdi met up with our friends and went to see "Fred Claus" in the cinema.
Came home around midnight and opened my presents yay!
From my parents i got a gorgeous necklace, a really pretty bag, loadsa No7 make-up (canny get it here) and money, yay! From my sister i got a nightmare before christmas notebook, pens and a snow-globe that has bats instead of snow!
On christmas day i went for a 5 course dinner at a cool restaurant with my friend and her kids. I got a complimentary santa hat, yay! At night i went out with mahdi to a few places and then went to a cafe called Le Chocolat which has the best chocolate cakes in Bahrain, yum yum!
So that was my christmas, im back at work on Saturday, im actually lookin forward to it coz iv bn off for 2 weeks and im bored!
- Mood: happy
I've been on holiday for the past week and i know its good to relax for a few days, but its just becoming a habit!
I know that iv been doing 'things' this week but its nothing new or interesting. Iv finished buying all my xmas presents and they're in the post, i've made all my xmas cards and sent them, iv cleaned my house as much as it can possibly be cleaned, iv ironed everything me and mahdi own, iv watched everything at the dvd store, my friends are all tied up with Eid (kinda like muslim xmas) and i have no money to do anything fun with, mahdi has been at work all week and now he has the flu, poor thing .....im bored.
I have another week off. So i can either carry on being boring and doing housework till there are holes in my rubber gloves or i can get off my arse and DO SOMETHING! coz even though im always doing something, im really doing NOTHING!
So my plan for the next week is to:
***** Make myself some new jewelry. Haven't done that in ages.
**** Take more photos, play with photoshop and get them online!
*** Get out the house and exercise. Maybe i'll go walking with friends i haven't seen for a bit.
** Read more of the zillion books i own but have never read!
* Learn guitar properly. I have 3 guitars and know like 3 chords, i should do something bout that.
Ok, sounds like a plan. The first step is to actually get myself out of bed and repeat 'my bed is not the centre of the universe.' I know i can be a bit of a lazy cow so i'll aim to do at least one of these 5 things each day. I've already planned to go walking with my Bulgarian friend tomorrow so thats one thing off the list : - )
Ok, i want inspiration! You got any? What makes you get outa bed when you've got a free day? What's the main thing you do for fun when u r alone and bored ? (i already know ur thinking of dirty answers so just stop right there!)
- Location:the back room
- Mood:
awake - Music:amy winehouse
Quick update:
1. Ran the marathon at 12.30pm up a bloody hill in the desert, it was boiling but i did it and got a medal!
2. Still enjoying my job but looking into getting a Masters degree in Marketing or something.
3. Been going to loadsa weddings lately but i accidentally went to one a whole week early, i really am thee sieveheid!
4. Dyed my hair bright red yas!!! Although loadsa ppl here dont like it, no one else in the country has hair like it, haha!
5. Been buying funky new furniture for the hoose, getting ready for...... (see number 6)....
6. Looking forward to Kelly in March, my parents in July, Alex in October, anybody else interested???
7. Received a huge package in the post: its my christmas presents from my family!!!!
Here are some photos of whats been going on......
- Mood: cheerful
Since i quit my horrible job things have been great, touch wood, thank god!
My new job teaching adults english is great! Im meeting people from all over the world and learning about their cultures while teaching them. The place i work for is all about conversation rather than writing and reading, so i get to talk all day and earn good money! I mostly teach Bahrainis but i have some students from Brazil, Libya, Italy and Spain! Today i got talking to one of the receptionists at work and found out that she's from Denmark, we swapped numbers and we're gona start hanging out, yay, a new friend! She said her husband used to work in Scotland so it'll be cool to meet him too. Two of the other teachers from work are Scottish so thats cool. I actually got another job offer today but i said no thanks coz im actually really happy where i am. I've never said that about a job before!
On friday im running a marathon relay! So i've been training with a group at night after work. I'm actually enjoying the running now that the weather has cooled down, i feel so good after i do it. Last night i ran 3K and my legs dont hurt today, yas! And iv got wee muscles appearing in my arms, just waiting for the six pack now, haha!
Well better go, wish me luck for the marathon on friday! Its at the Formula One track so thats quite cool, vroooom!
- Location:my bed
- Mood:energetic
People here dont like their pictures being put online so u wont see many pictures of people who were there but oh well.
The last pic is of mad's sister, she looooves halloween and dressed up even tho i gave her an hour to get ready!
Since kelly made me a halloween cake, i made her a halloween burger coz we had a bbq in the garden, i couldn't manage writing her whole name so i thought KS in tommy sauce would do, enjoy. Check out our black christmas tree with halloween tinsel!
- Mood: peaceful
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